I have to say, "just keeping my head above water" is no longer working out.
The property is too large, the job takes too much time, the cats are being cared for but not adopted out because there are no additional hours for off-site adoptions and creative advertising. A day off at work puts me behind at work. A rainstorm puts me
behind in lawn work.
However, I don't wake up to a "surprise extra day" one week. And a sunny day doesn't give more hours.
I have foster homes. I have friends. I have family I can talk to. I am not lacking for people. What I am lacking is time. And I'm afraid this is a finite universe. No one is going to hand me another ten hours each day.
I've talked to some enthusiastic folks about moving in here for "work-for-rent", and what frightens me is it appears they may take even more time than what they might produce in help with the cats, or with help with the property.
Some of them want to "learn about rescue" as if they believe living here will be an internship rather than work-for-rent. Some just want a cheap place to live and I don't get the feeling that they are willing to sweat under the hot sun with a weedwacker, or get up an extra hour early to shovel snow PLUS take care of the cats before work. I envision a sink full of dishes for two instead of one, or more animals running around the house, or a dirthy bathroom.
One of the advantages of living alone is that I did find my housework takes much less time. :)
I haven't yet found a person sounds enough like they "get it." Some of the people who sort of sound like they "get it" have quite a few animals themselves. I really can only fit perhaps one more dog and a cat or two. Even then there would have to be no more fostering of kittens in the house.
I've continued to work with a professional counselor/time manager, but it's not quite the success I'd hoped for. For example, I'm told "You must stop work at quitting time on Friday. Saturday must be for you. If you must work on the weekend, pick a log-in and log-out time on Sunday so you are up-to-date on Monday." It does sound good on paper. But if someone has questions just after 6 on Friday, and it doesn't get dealt with until Sunday it can make for a frantic Sunday or Monday a.m.
Sometimes I realize I haven't walked the dog, or gotten out to take care of the cats at the normal time. That is simply unacceptable. These are living creatures. By virtue of the fact that they live and breathe, they have to be priority number one.
So with all due respect to the time manager, it ain't working out as simply as it's listed in the pamphlets. I'm told: "You should only have six things on your to-do list each day." Well, maybe if I defined things broadly, like just "Work. Cats. House. Personal Hygiene, Shopping, Friends/Family" I might be able to get it down to six. :)
And then we explore: "Perhaps you have too many things on your plate." We've discussed me going back to being an admin assistant, selling the farm, stopping the cat work, and starting from scratch since no one will be able to find me. But I'm 47. Do I give up everything I enjoy? I'm told "Well, you'll be able to eat out all you want; spend time with friends and family." Yes, until I'm in a wheelchair. Then what do I look back on?
So I decided that I just have to deal with the cats and commitments I currently have and just say "no" to new cats. This has been a tough decision to make, especially at this time of year. However, with the phone message changed (Sorry, can't take cats), a new email autoresponse on (Sorry, can't take cats)...
...People have taken to showing up on my porch.
On Friday, someone showed up with a whole box of kittens...their own. I don't blame anyone for looking for help with a stray, or feral cats, but if you drive a nicer vehicle than mine, and have at least the same educational background I do, you are able to find a home for your own kittens. You have access to the same resources I do. I began with my usual patter about home-finding, but the person was not getting the hint. Finally I was blunt: You have the same financial resources I do. You have more space than I do. You need to find homes for these kittens yourself. If I can do it, you can do it. We are both intelligent human beings, and I already have 5 adoptable kittens ramming around my house and seventeen cats for adoption in my facility, not to mention 6 pet cats. If you leave these kittens on my porch, I have your license plate number and I'll call the troopers.
That did NOT go over well. I wonder now if they dumped the kittens alongside the road somewhere. That kind of thing robs you of sleep. I literally have no room here, and I have two people who really DO need help, who aren't responsible for the kittens on their doorstep.
Then I came home Saturday ("my day for myself and friends/family"), and someone else had been by and left a note about a stray (pictured above). Hey, I don't blame them for looking for help where ever they can get it. But that's two in two days, and I assume it will only get worse. I can't avoid answering my door, because my dog is out there during the day, surveying her tiny kingdom. Then I go in the house, and there are messages on the machine. Then I check my Wildrun email...you get the drift.
There are alternatives. I could set up a volunteer network to call people back, just as I have people who foster, and people who come by to care for the cats when I'm out of town. But there comes a point where the rescue keeps getting bigger and bigger, rather than maintaining its size. At what point do you stop?
It becomes a customer-service dilemma. Do I have a responsibility to help all these people? Well, if I have a web site that says I help, I guess I do.
So it's time to update the website as well, so it's clear that it's a web site about teaching people to help themselves, period. I no longer have the time to run out and respond personally. I enjoy doing it, but right now, the time just isn't there.
I will be posting volunteer needs on the Wildrun blog directly. I do realize that if you need help, you have to ask for it, but you have to be clear.
So I'll be clear.
Wildrun has to stay small, or it has to go. And sadly, if one other thing goes (the job, the farm) then the cat rescue goes as well. Because I need the job to pay for it, and I need the farm to house it. I can buy a smaller place, but it would cost more per month than this spot, because I would need a larger mortgage and would need to renovate for the cats.
There aren't any simple answers. But we all know that. We all run up against the same things...just different issues in all our different lives. If you've come up with any magic time-savers, please feel free to post them in comments!
4 comments:
I keep coming back to this post . I wish I had an answer for you, but you are only one person and you do so much already. You have to take care of you before you can help others .Take care and I will send up a prayer for you. bcat
Ugh, I feel you completely. Here's my thoughts, although maybe it's not so helpful! haha. Oh - my use of the word 'you' is purely figurative.
What is the first thing you do in an emergency situation? Ensure your own safety. Just like in the aircraft drill - put your own mask on before assisting others. I know this isn't an emergency situation but the reasoning is the same: you can't help anyone if you're not in a good sound state, and you most definitely don't want the roles to reverse where you switch from the helper to the helpee.
I think the oxygen mask has just appeared in front of you.
To get you safe, you need to define what you want, then define what you need to fulfill that want. Simple. :D I think you already know what you want, and to hear you talk about sacrificing the farm and cats breaks my heart, not for the cats but because it's something you've always appeared to be so passionate about, and well, if you're not living for your passions then you're just doing the time and punching the card.
My brain seems to work best in reverse. I never know what I want, but I know what I don't want. So I systematically elimate the don't wants and that by default leaves me with what I do want (I just didn't know it). Perhaps rather than looking at what you want look at what you don't want. You don't want people turning up at random with kittens. You don't want more cats than you can care for. You don't want to spend more than X hours a day on them. So how do you achieve those things?
With the more kittens I'm not sure what the problem is and I suspect it isn't just one it's several. It's not that you don't *want* to take kittens, it's simple physics that you can't. So, wanting to take the kittens isn't the problem. Next Level: You don't want them dumped, that's one of the real problems. Next Level: People know you as a Cat-Taker so they bring you their cats (and probably surprised when you say you can't). That is a real problem. A change of local knowledge will stop a portion of that. Your business cards are around so I suspect a lot of people look at those. A BIG sign at the gate saying SORRY NO LONGER TAKING CATS might help, as well as maybe taking cards down from vet centers and other places where it's at. I'm thinking a sign like an orchard has, about whether they have produce or not "APPLES" "NO APPLES". Oh oh - or like a hotel: VACANCY or NO VACANCY. :D You call also put on that board 3 KITTENS, 4 CATS... a list of what you currently have for adoption (those numbers aren't right but just to give you an idea). But a big sign at your gate, or even at the end of your road or the nearest highway, might help. Could you charge people a small fee to surrender the animal (might encourage people to find homes themselves, you're an easy free 'dump-and-go' option).
Wow. I've really written way too much and I feel like I haven't begun so I'm going to stop, and apologise. I hope I haven't been out of line with any of that. Just desperately want to help.
You do have to take care of yourself. Don't think about giving up the farm; but do think about keeping cat rescue small. There really are other people out there who will rescue. All feral and homeless cats are NOT your responsibility.
Go with a renter and be real clear that they will be expected to do their own dishes, cooking, cleaning up. Go for a three month trial and let them know they may be asked to leave.
Oh geez, Oh geez, Oh geez. Thank you for writing that post -- for articulating the real bind for perhaps more of us than anyone can guess.
The economic facts are making people volunteer and donate really close to home -- i.e., RIGHT AT HOME. In other words folks are lending ten dollars to their son or their grandchild, but then they don't have that bill to give to cat rescue.
You are right that lots of people who have spare time to give, seem like they are a lot of upfront work to mobilize! Here we have a few people who love animals, and want very much to do their part, only, they seem rather useless as far as thinking of what needs to be done, the best way to do it, it seems as though we're perennially in teaching mode, getting little done ourselves.
And small is great, until you are trying to seriously raise money, or address a little more of the need. It's the brags about volumes of adoptions or spay/neuters, that garner support, and seldom the very real support you give to the new caretaker or the person whose neighbor is irate. All that, that's FREE, right?? Argh.
Time management always sounds great. Yeah, I've tried that too (books, though, not a coach). I manage my time pretty seriously well, and I have good boundaries, too! But if you are more capable to start with, than most, you will find you look around and there is not someone else to pass the task over to. You're stuck.
You've my deepest sympathies! All I can offer is, do be kind to yourself, and enjoy the moments that you can.
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